July 2009
53 posts
I'm sorry, but I proposing on Twitter is lame. I...
June 2009
75 posts
“It’s bad enough we just lost three celebrities, and now a friend.”
– Some Philadelphian regarding this.
(via)
If you're a B-List celebrity, you better watch...
So, apparently, two people were shot at my old... →
Tower Development bigwigs are planning yet another name change of the complex in hopes people won’t put two and two together.
I'm never actually drunk when Mail Goggles kick...
“Bilas said Griffin could ‘finish with either hand’ twice in eight...”
– Bill Simmons
(via)
Worldwide Vegan Bake Sale →
Not as good as vegan potluck.
Kodak offers reward to whoever can reunite Rose... →
The person that can connect them gets $5000. Then Kodak will fly the kid and his family to meet the vacuous blob so she can tell the 12-year-old about her bowel movements, sex life, and whatever other idiotic things she talks about in interviews.
How the hell does IMDB elude pop-up blockers? Why...
Endless Sunrise →
In case you need a reminder of what the sun looks like during this summer of gloom.
WatchThere’s probably something really profound I could say about this with regard to human psychology, but instead I’ll just laugh.
New job! New job!
Speaking of New Jersey beaches.
I once went to The Princeton in Avalon. It was a vodka red bull-infused crowd, mostly male, salivating and sweating. On the way in I didn’t wait in line, so a drunk girl tried to trip me. Inside a guy told my body was “disproportionate in all the right ways.”
I promptly left and got tacos around the corner.
“Last time I was there bros were upstairs dancing with their shirts off.”
– I thought dudes from Jersey loved that ish?
(sexypants:weliveindc)
I've got a perfect body, though sometimes I...
I’d like to take a moment to clarify that, though this is a Coors Light logo cup, I was NOT drinking Coors Light.
Thank you and good night.
billmartin:
The other day I discovered that some days when traffic was really tight on Euclid I used to have to park in front of what I now know to be Raymond Carver’s old house on the 800 block of Maryland Ave. If I’d known then I probably would’ve been inclined to stop and smell the roses (or look at the icicles).
How did you find this out!?
Book and beer on NJ Transit.
Another interview, another day of 90% humidity....
Dear fellow large-breasted ladies,
Please start wearing bras and stop swinging your tits around like they’re double dutch ropes. Every time I see that shit my chest hurts.
WTFFFFFFFFF. →
Let me tell you something about my family, we are...
My sister and I couldn’t stop saying this while making our way through the Newark airport on the way to Hawaii in April. It’s since lost its luster as a family catchphrase, but this did still elicit a chuckle.
(soupsoup)
Magnolia Electric Co. - The Handing Down
So, this kid I knew in school was on The Tonight... →
He lost the game of tether ball. Climbing the comedy ladder, I suppose?
